Having been up most of the night with the preparation going on, the moment I walked through the doors I HAD to go. If I had known how much of a problem this was going to cause later on, I would have rather waited. Alas hindsight is a marvellous thing.
I got to the unit and gave my name, was asked where my baby was and then took a seat. A this point Tony was dropping the 2 bigger children off with childcarers who would be able to look after them and drop them off at school etc.
After about 45 minutes waiting I was called to meet my anaesthetist who was lovely and went through a few questions about me and my history. We talked about my crappy veins and she reassured me that this would not be a problem.
I went back into the waiting room and then was called to be admitted by a HCA. Again the bowel related urgency struck and I needed to go. She gave me a sample pot, and I really tried, but having not drunk anything since about midnight, all I could produce was bowel motions.
I went into her room and went through all the questions again. I mean the NHS could be so much more efficient if one person did this rather than the 3 that I eventually saw, who went through the same thing. She told me that I really needed to try and produce a sample.
About 9am Tony & Hope arrived, as the anaesthetist had told me I was first on the list I decided to feed Hope fairly soon. Just after I had finished feeding her I was called to meet the consultant who would do the procedure. I signed all he consent forms and was told to change into a hospital gown and the lovely stockings.
Then a nurse came in and told me I couldn't go until I had passed urine. At this point I had tried three times and was not able to pass urine. I couldn't understand why it was so important and told her I had passed urine when I entered the hospital as due to the colonoscopy prep I had had to go, and was not able to produce anymore.
As I was explaining this, the nurse walked out of the room and I could overhear her talking to a colleague about how I was shouting and abusing her. I DID NOT SHOUT AND I CERTAINLY WASN'T ABUSING HER. I had calmly pointed out that this was stressful for me due to having just fed my baby because I knew I was due to go up, and I could not always produce urine on demand.
Eventually, probably about an hour later, someone else, I don't know who she was, came in and told me I had to pass urine. I explained I couldn't. All they wanted to know was whether I could be pregnant. I can definitely confirm there is no way I am pregnant. All someone had to do was ask.
Eventually I was taken up to theatre and met my anaesthetist again.
She couldn't find a vein, so gave me some lovely gas, which I took three puffs and I was out.
I woke up in recovery, with a cannula in the crook of my elbow and a lovely nurse checking all my vital signs.
I was eventually reunited with Tony and Hope, who had refused the bottle he offered her, and then the consultant came round.
I'm still processing what he told me.
My colon is clear, no problems, nothing to worry about. But he did take some biopsies for microcollitis.
We had a bit of a chat about my symptoms and he is referring me for an endoscopy, to check my stomach, but he agrees something is definitely wrong with the way my body is processing my food.
In the meantime I am the proud owner of a photo of the inside of my colon!!
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